Ingredients:

  • ½ cup of yearning
  • 1 cup of solitude
  • ½  cup of nonsense, finely chopped
  • 2 cups of heartbreak
  • 3 cups of wisdom
  • ½ cup pain-of-loss
  • 3 large Seeds of Faith, cracked and well beaten
  • 2 sticks of Once Upon A Time, room temperature
  • 3 tablespoons of childhood
  • 2 tablespoons of powdered crazy
  • A dash of Happily Ever After (or to taste)

 

Method:

  1. Sift yearning and solitude into a large mixing heart.
  2. To the heart, add the sticks of Once Upon a Time gradually until consistency is lumpy; firm when squeezed together, but remains loose.
  3. Add to the heart the Seeds of Faith and blend with a dream-mixer on low speed until smooth.
  4. To the heart, blend in childhood, then let stand in the refrigerator for approximately 20 to 25 years, perhaps a little longer depending on your fridge.
  5. Remove from fridge and allow batter to come to room temperature.
  6. While batter is thawing, add heartbreak to a saucepan and simmer until it thickens to a syrup.  Allow to cool.
  7. Begin to blend in the heartbreak to the batter, little by little, at medium speed.  This is the most vital ingredient.

    NB:  BE SURE NOT TO ADD TOO MUCH HEARTBREAK ALL AT ONCE OTHERWISE THE BATTER MAY CONGEAL AND LOSE UNIFORMITY.

  8. With a mixing spoon, turn into the batter the pain-of-loss.  The batter should now have the consistency of dough.  Knead the dough well, pounding it and flipping it over and over several times.
  9. Add wisdom to the dough very slowly, continuing to kneed and pound, as necessary.
  10. Knead and pound the dough some more, and then some more.  And when you think you’ve finished kneading and pounding the dough, knead and pound some more.  This is also crucial.
  11. Place the dough into a deep baking pan, greased with a little Once Upon A Time and well powdered with crazy so as to avoid the dough sticking to the pan and burning.
  12. In a saucepan, over medium-high heat, toast the finely chopped nonsense until golden-brown.
  13. Sprinkle over the top of the dough some of the toasted finely chopped nonsense and save the rest for garnishing later.
  14. Bake dough at 350 degrees Celsius for 5 years.  Some ovens may take a little longer.
  15. Once the loaf-cake is done, remove from oven and cool completely before garnishing with the remaining toasted nonsense and sprinkle with Happily Ever After to taste.

 

Serves exactly 2 people.  Loaf may require frosting depending on the audience being served.

 

 *****

 

You ask me why I behave so immaturely most of the time; why I speak with a repulsive stutter of nonsense and utter craziness.  The answer is that this ‘immaturity’ is the desperate clinging on to whatever childhood innocence I can recollect to shield me from Maturity that is a bullying bombardment of heartbreak and pain-of-loss.  I quiver at the thought of losing someone yet again, so I block myself off to the opportunity, regardless of how much I’d like to move on with the dynamic of life.  Catch-Twenty-Two of Khan-flict.

If you dare to crack my shell of immaturity that I so often retreat into, you will find a dusty, untouched library of wisdom that goes by ignored simply because not very many people bother to read anymore.

This is my damage.  What’s yours?

(C)